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Top Things To Support Those Experiencing Divorce

Tuesday, May 22nd, 2024

How Can We Support Those Who Are Going Through Divorce?


Mette Harrison is a novelist who also works in the financial industry. She was blindsided by her husband’s leaving her after six kids and 30 years of marriage. She also lost half of her friends. Sound familiar? According to a 2013 study headed by Brown University scholar Rose McDermott, if people in your close social network divorce, the risk of your marriage ending greatly increases. The result is that many divorced people find themselves losing not only a mate but the family home, their lifestyle and their friends.

Learning to accept and ask for help

One woman who was mourning the loss of friends also admits that “I didn’t know what I needed even when people asked.” One friend offered a bed until Ms. Harrison could find an apartment; another walked her through a frank assessment of her financial situation. A third texted every day for a year — a simple back and forth that she depended on to calm her panic in the early months. Her older brother set up a recurring monthly payment for rent and food plus a wish list on Amazon.

I can’t fix it, but I’m here for you

There are many ways to help those slammed by the shame, shock and economic panic of a separation or divorce. Ashley Mead, a New York psychotherapist who specializes in divorce, recommends connection. “Divorcees are losing the person they have been most connected to for their whole lives,” said Ms. Mead in an email. “They are often desperate and feel incredible shame.”

“Show up,” but forget “I told you so.” If you don’t know what to say, try this: “I know I can’t fix it but I am here for you. Trying to cheer someone up is often about calming our own discomfort.” Ensure that your friend has a place to vent, cry, laugh and think out loud.” Don’t stop inviting divorced friends to parties just because they are single. Call them on holidays even years after the divorce is over. Remember that it takes a few years to make new friends and rebuild a social network. A supportive person helps you see yourself in a bright next chapter, not someone who urges you to complain or stay mired in victim mode.

Offer to help with small projects

Divorce often means that now there’s just one person to manage daily chores–carpooling, paying bills, yard work. If you’re looking for creative ways to support a friend, think about offering to babysit one night/week, helping clean house once/month, car repair or small projects around the house.

Grief, loss and validation

For those who tell their friends they’re divorcing and their friends respond with “Great!”–that’s validation that it’s way past time to get out of a bad relationship. The language around divorce is all about failure, but sometimes it’s a victory that can help people make needed change.

The economics of divorce

The economic impact of almost every divorce hits hard; studies show that income may drop, especially for women. In an earlier article, we noted women’s standard of living may drop 27%. Details around spousal and child support take months and to get ironed out. Sydney Petite left her marriage in July of 2018 with three children. While she was awarded support from her ex-husband, she didn’t receive any payments for nearly three years. “I am where I am today because of unexpected support,” she said.

Other avenues of support could include gathering friends to pay for a few hours of an attorney’s time or organizing meal deliveries. “It can take years to get back to a stable financial situation,” said Alex Beattie, co-founder of Divide and Thrive, a downloadable financial divorce tool. “Dropping off a few meals or a few movie tickets can lighten someone’s spirits without costing much.”

Sonoma County LDA’s Divorce and Mediation Services

Sonoma County LDA has been assisting Bay Area couples with Divorce for nearly 20 years. While the majority of our clients may not have worked out the details, they know they are willing to reach agreement on division of assets and a parenting plan—and those are the critical components of an Amicable Divorce. Our Guided Mediation is for couples whose Divorce has stalled for whatever reasons. We guide you through it, and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley, Benicia, Vallejo, Martinez, Fairfield.

This article based on an article in The New York Times.

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 12:46 PM No comments: 

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Wednesday, February 9, 2022

Power of Attorney: There’s Always Room for Family Conflict

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Anyone who grew up in a dysfunctional family understands the potential for discord when it comes to the family estate and an inheritance. But even in the closest of families, if there’s money involved, there’s room for conflict.

Power of Attorney: Choose the person you can trust

In Alana’s case, the dust was still settling on her third divorce, and one of her kids was in and out of rehab for substance abuse. The youngest of three siblings, Alana always struggled to measure up to her rock-star brother and sister—they were the ones who excelled at everything they did, winning awards, graduating with honors and building successful careers. She was the one who always seemed to make a mess of everything.

And now her parents had named her brother their Agent for their Power of Attorney. She was hurt because this was something she had wanted to do—a chance to redeem herself to her family. But the fact that her own financial affairs were a mess and she couldn’t balance her own checkbook led her father to appoint her investment banker brother. It was he who would also be the Executor of the estate. Her sister, a doctor, would be their parents’ Agent for their Healthcare Directives. Alana was left out once again.

Your Power of Attorney is the person who will act on your behalf if you become incapacitated, the one who will take over your financial affairs, pay your bills and taxes, open bank accounts, withdraw funds, cash checks and trade stocks. It must be someone you trust; ideally, it’s someone who lives close by.

Parents tend to appoint one of their children as Power of Attorney for practical reasons. Many put their faith in their oldest child or choose the son or daughter who lives closest or the one who has a financial services background. In the same vein, for their Agent for an Advance Healthcare Directive, parents are likely to choose a son or daughter with healthcare experience.

There are limits on the powers of the Power of Attorney designation

  • Right to information. The parent does not have to disclose to friends and family whom he or she named as Agent under the Power of Attorney. Likewise, that Agent is not obligated to provide information about the parent to his or her siblings.
  • Limits on the powers of a Power of Attorney. A Power of Attorney designation does not enable the Agent to do whatever he or she wants. An Agent cannot change the principal’s will, breach his or her fiduciary duty or change or transfer the Power of Attorney designation to someone else.
  • Power of Attorney expires at death. When the parent dies, the Power of Attorney ends and the Executor of the estate – appointed by either the principal or the court – takes control over the decedent’s property.
  • Revocation of a Power of Attorney. The parent can revoke whomever he/she has appointed as the Power of Attorney. The revocation must be in writing and the former Agent Power of Attorney should be advised of the revocation.

Avoiding the potential for sibling discord

Sometimes conflict is inevitable. One child may be resentful that he or she was not chosen. Another child may not trust the chosen sibling to act according to the parent’s wishes. Just knowing that a Power of Attorney can be challenged in court is often enough for a sibling to act on his or her distrust or resentment. To minimize confrontations, as the principal appointing the Power of Attorney, there are alternative solutions:

  • Designate co-Agents in the Power of Attorney document. Appointing two persons can be problematic if the Agents cannot get along. You could create separate responsibilities for each Agent, but that can be unwieldy and still can lend itself to conflict.
  • Avoid appointing a family member altogether. Name a close friend, fiduciary or a bank. Avoiding conflicts and court involvement is important to ensure your wishes will be followed.

A Living Trust: One of the most thoughtful things you can do for your family

A Living Trust is a legal document that contains instructions for what you want to happen to your assets when you die. For my family, it meant that when my parents died, all of their affairs were in order, they had transferred all of their assets into the Living Trust and identified their heirs. Without a Living Trust, their estate would have gone into Probate and my brother and I would have been dealing with this long, expensive process—even while mourning the death of our parents.

Sonoma County LDA is proud of our comprehensive Living Trust package that includes a Power of Attorney and Advanced Healthcare DirectiveBest of all, we guide you through it and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley, Benicia, Vallejo, Martinez, Fairfield.

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 12:45 PM No comments: 

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Wednesday, February 2, 2022

Reverse Mortgage: Solution or Scam?

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When Jeannie was having trouble making ends meet after her husband died, she asked my friend Jim what he thought about reverse mortgages. Jim spent 40 years in the financial services industry, and these guys tend to be wary of things like life insurance and reverse mortgages. As predicted, Jim told her it was a very bad idea. To her credit, Jeannie ignored Jim and decided to go through with a reverse mortgage on the home she and her husband bought more than 30 years ago.

The right decision for Jeannie and many other seniors

It’s been four years, and for Jeannie, it was the right decision. A reverse mortgage has eased her cash-flow problems and improved the quality of her life. For many older homeowners, a reverse mortgage is the ideal way to supplement retirement income, consolidate debts or cover expenses like health care.

Accessing your home’s equity and using it like a savings account

A reverse mortgage is a type of loan that’s designed to give people access to the equity they’ve built up in their homes. In Jeannie’s case, this was considerable—a lovely home in Pasadena that they bought 30+ years ago that was paid off. The borrower gets what is, in effect, a tax-free advance on their equity, in the form of a line of credit, fixed monthly payments or a lump sum. For most reverse mortgages, homeowners must use the proceeds to pay off their existing mortgage; the remainder of the loan comes due when the owner moves, sells the house or dies.

Available to homeowners 62 and over, reverse mortgages are somewhat complex, and they can be risky. With a target audience of potentially vulnerable seniors, scam artists have proliferated, drawing homeowners into bad or outright bogus deals. While the scams vary, the premise remains the same: The scammers want to put the home equity these seniors have spent years accumulating into their own pockets.

Beware a group effort by a team of real-estate industry scammers

It’s often a group effort, with unscrupulous mortgage brokers or financial advisers joining forces with corrupt appraisers, attorneys and loan officers. They’ll finagle an inflated appraisal of a home’s value, thus inflating the equity and the potential loan, and try to persuade the owner to take out a reverse mortgage. The team of crooks will handle the paperwork, close the loan and come up with a pretext to get the money or even take title to the house.

  • These fraudsters might try to sell you on a supposedly can’t-miss investment or financial product.
  • A scam contractor may fast-talk you into using a reverse mortgage to pay for home improvements.
  • Some scammers target financially strapped homeowners, touting reverse mortgages as a way to avoid foreclosure or get out of debt.
  • They may charge fees running into the thousands of dollars to provide information about reverse mortgages that’s actually available for free from the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD).

In California, you’re required to meet with a HUD counselor

Note that for a legitimate reverse mortgage in California, you must meet with a reverse mortgage counselor approved by the U.S. Department of Housing & Urban Development (HUD). This counselor is trained to make sure you thoroughly understand the benefits and risks of reverse mortgages.

Warning signs of reverse mortgage scams

  • A broker or lender uses high-pressure tactics to try to talk you into a reverse mortgage.
  • They claim the loan is safe because it’s insured by the Federal Housing Administration (FHA). The FHA does insure some reverse mortgages, but that coverage doesn’t protect the borrower; it’s for the lender, in case of default.
  • They don’t disclose the fees, conditions and risks that come with taking out a reverse mortgage, including the possible loss of the home, which serves as collateral.

Tips for avoiding scams. Do not:

  • Respond to unsolicited advertisements.
  • Sign anything that you do not fully understand.
  • Accept payment from individuals for a home you did not purchase.

Be suspicious of anyone claiming that you can own a home with no down payment.

To report a scam: AARP Fraud Watch Network Helpline. 877-908-3360

A Living Trust: One of the most thoughtful things you can do for your family

A Living Trust is a legal document that contains instructions for what you want to happen to your assets when you die. For my family, it meant that when my parents died, all of their affairs were in order, they had transferred all of their assets into the Living Trust and identified their heirs. Without a Living Trust, their estate would have gone into Probate and my brother and I would have been dealing with this long, expensive process—even while mourning the death of our parents.

Sonoma County LDA is proud of our comprehensive Living Trust package that includes a Power of Attorney and Advanced Healthcare DirectiveBest of all, we guide you through it and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley, Benicia, Vallejo, Martinez, Fairfield.

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 11:03 AM No comments: 

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Wednesday, January 26, 2022

Wearables Have Stepped up to Monitor Your Health

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A Sonoma County LDA Trust client, Shirley, decided that the new year was time for making long overdue changes to her life. She made an appointment to create a Living Trust, which includes a Power of Attorney and an Advance Healthcare Directive, that she’d been putting off for years. She started doing yoga twice/week and got serious about using the smartwatch her kids gave her for Christmas.

Smartwatches keep getting smarter

A 62-year old bookkeeper, Shirley has high blood pressure and some other health issues. She’s delighted with her smartwatch—she sets alarms during the day that remind her to get up from her desk and stretch–this is especially important as tax season looms. She now takes a brisk walk during her lunch break, and she’s using her smartwatch to monitor her blood pressure and oxygen levels.

Today’s smartwatches and other health-related wearables do a lot more than count steps or let you see how many calories you’ve burned.

 


Socks monitor foot temperature, helping reduce foot ulcers for diabetes patients

San Francisco-based Siren is producing a wearable for your feet–machine-washable socks for people living with diabetes and neuropathy. The socks come with a Bluetooth hub that plugs in and lets a team of nurses monitor the temperature of the foot, which Siren says has been shown to reduce diabetic foot ulcers by up to 87.5 percent. On the market for about five years, Medicare covers the cost. You need a prescription but not a smartphone.

Other health wearables on the cusp

  • Swiss startup Aktiia announced plans to bring its automated wrist-worn 24/7 blood pressure device to the United States. The company has about 15,000 customers in Europe.
  • Abbott announced a new line of consumer “biowearables” to continuously track signals for glucose, ketones and lactate. It will eventually track alcohol levels.
  • Worn on the back of the arm, FreeStyle Libre is about the size of two stacked quarters and is used widely by diabetics. A tiny filament the width of three human hairs is placed just below the surface of the skin, where it measures molecular biomarkers. Data is sent via Bluetooth to an app on your smartphone every minute, giving users insights into what’s going on in real time. It’s available by prescription and lasts 14 days, when the user peels it off and applies a new one.

Information accuracy is best when backed up by a doctor or FDA

While there are no guarantees with these wearable devices, you generally can put more faith in a device that your doctor prescribes or recommends, or that has the blessing of the FDA.

Swiss company Aktiia plans to make its blood pressure watch available through doctors rather than as a direct-to-consumer offering, at least initially. The company is engaged in clinical partnerships and pilots in the U.S., including a study with hypertension patients at Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston. As the technology evolves, so will the safety and data protocols.

Data must be understandable and secure

When in doubt, reach out to your doctor. The onus is on the makers of the wearable devices to clearly explain what the data mean and the consequences. You should also be informed about a device’s limitations. A good example: When you launch the ECG app on the Apple Watch, you’ll see a message that says “Apple Watch never checks for heart attacks.”

If you’re not aware of privacy issues these days, you’re not paying attention. Find out how the device makers and medical providers plan to safeguard your information and keep it confidential. The FTC affirmed in September 2021 that health apps and connected devices that collect or hold fertility, glucose level, heart health and other health data must notify consumers in the event of a breach.

With the promise comes peril

“There’s promise in all of this technology, but also peril,” says Patrice Harris, chief executive officer and cofounder of digital health care company eMed and former president of the American Medical Association. “I always say proceed with caution and have some curiosity.”

Creating a Living Trust: One of the most thoughtful things you can do for your family

A Living Trust is a legal document that contains instructions for what you want to happen to your assets when you die. For my family, it meant that when my parents died, all of their affairs were in order, they had transferred all of their assets into the Living Trust and identified their heirs. Without a Living Trust, their estate would have gone into Probate and my brother and I would have been dealing with this long, expensive process—even while mourning the death of our parents.

Sonoma County LDA is proud of our comprehensive Living Trust package that includes a Power of Attorney and Advanced Healthcare DirectiveBest of all, we guide you through it and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley,

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 10:12 AM No comments: 

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Wednesday, January 19, 2022

Women, Divorce and the Economic Realities

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Each year, nearly 2.8 million men and women go through Divorce. In the first year after the Divorce is final, a wife’s standard of living may drop almost 27 percent. Compare that to her husband’s standard of living—it may increase by as much as 10 percent! In the nearly 20 years that Sonoma County LDA has been assisting our clients with Divorce, it’s hardly surprising that women are concerned about financial survival in the high-priced Bay Area.

Many factors contribute to lowering the standard of living         

Women generally end up with custody of the kids, and child support may not be enough to cover the actual cost of child rearing. For stay-at-home moms or those who held part-time jobs, getting back into the workforce and finding well-paying jobs is extremely difficult. It takes years to get on a career path to start making a good living. Divorce is expensive—there are court costs, therapist bills, getting established in new living situations based on a single paycheck. If you are contemplating divorce, now is the time to rethink your spending. Where can you cut back and start saving money that you’re going to need?

Do your research. Talk to single moms; consult with a financial adviser

If you’re contemplating Divorce, start doing some research. Talk to your friends who are single moms. Be fully aware of just how difficult it will be—especially if you don’t have family to help with the kids. Consult with a lawyer and a financial advisor. Make sure you’ve fully considered the impact of Divorce on your kids, your spouse and your life. Think about timing. If you’ve been married nine years, you might want to stick out the last year, so you can collect on your ex’s earnings record.

Make copies of all financial documents

Make a copy of all tax returns, loan applications, wills, trusts, financial statements, your mortgage, banking information, brokerage statements, loan documents, credit card statements, deeds to real property, car registration, insurance inventories, and insurance policies. If you have assets that you brought into the marriage, these will remain yours as long as you can document your ownership.

Be suspicious. Look for signs that your husband may be hiding income

Make sure you’re including any safe deposit boxes and reviewing pay stubs, retirement plans, and insurance policies. If your spouse’s business generates a lot of cash, find a forensic accountant to look for signs of additional income that he may be hiding. Don’t overlook hobbies or side businesses that generate income. Here’s an example: My neighbor Allen makes exquisite knives in his workshop that he sells for up to $1K/each. Working with iron and metal is his hobby, and when he sells something, there’s no record of it, and he doesn’t pay any taxes. But at $1K/each, he’s generating a nice little revenue stream. California is a community property state, and you’re entitled to half of this kind of income.

Did you help your husband get a degree or pay for grad school?

My accountant put her husband through law school, and he’s now a partner in a prestigious San Francisco law firm. When he wanted a divorce, she put her savvy CPA brain to work and received a generous compensation for those years she worked to put him through school.

Consider big-picture tax consequences

Get an accountant to help you make these decisions because they will have profound effects on your future and that of your children.

  • Monthly alimony or a lump sum?
  • What is his retirement plan worth?
  • Should you keep the family home or sell it now?
  • Who pays the mortgage until it sells?

Selling the family home is a difficult decision, but in too many cases, women hang on to the house because of the emotional bonds. They want their kids to stay in a neighborhood where they have friends and feel safe. But in too many cases, that home is too expensive to maintain. The constant upkeep, the landscaping and repairs, the mow and blow guy who comes once/week. All of this becomes a burden. Better to move to a smaller home in a neighborhood that’s more affordable.

Become your own advocate. Prepare for your future

Be informed. Taking an active role in the divorce negotiations will help you reach a better settlement. During our Guided Mediation, we often see couples improving communication through the mediation process. They will need this as they raise their kids together. Stand up for yourself and get your share so you’re able to take care of yourself and your children financially.

If you stayed home to take care of your kids, you’ll need to find a way to support yourself and your children. Get career counseling and training. You may need to go back to school, so prepare for the expense of tuition and books. You’re creating a new life for your family.

Sonoma County LDA’s Divorce and Mediation Services

Sonoma County LDA has been assisting Bay Area couples with Divorce for nearly 20 years. While the majority of our clients may not have worked out the details, they know they are willing to reach agreement on division of assets and a parenting plan—and those are the critical components of an Amicable Divorce. Our Guided Mediation is for couples whose Divorce has stalled for whatever reasons. We guide you through it, and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley, Benicia, Vallejo, Martinez, Fairfield.

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 1:47 PM No comments: 

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Labels: #assetsandliabilities#divisionofproperty#divorce#financialsurvival#guideddivorce#hidingincome#mediateddivorce#mediation#parentingplan#womenanddivorce

Wednesday, January 12, 2022

The Crisis of Caregiving: A Legal Checklist

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If you’re paying attention, you’re aware that the subject of caregiving is coming up a lot more frequently in the news and in conversations with friends and colleagues. The AARP is devoting one of its monthly newsletter to a variety of topics related to caring for America’s aging family members. Two years of Covid have made the situation worse. While we don’t hear enough about it, many Covid survivors are left with conditions as severe and varied as organ failure, brain fog, memory loss, fatigue, loss of smell and taste, etc. Many people are no longer able to return to their pre-Covid lives or employment. It’s their family members who are left coping with their care.

If you’re a caregiver, part of your job may be to keep track of your loved one’s legal matters. 

1. Creating a Living Trust

A Living Trust is the legal document that outlines the way in which your assets will pass on to your loved ones when you die. Our Living Trust package also includes a Will, a Power of Attorney and an Advance Healthcare Directive. These legal documents will allow an appointed person to make medical or financial decisions for those who are incapacitated or no longer able to make these decisions for themselves. A loved one needs to create these documents when he or she is still capable of making legal decisions. With the diagnosis of dementia on the rise, testamentary capacity— a person’s legal and mental ability to make or alter a valid legal document—has become a growing concern.

2. Make a family plan; share caregiving responsibilities

Not surprisingly, two out of every three caregivers in the United States are women. Somehow they’re getting it done–holding down full-time jobs, taking care of the home, raising their kids and providing regular support for family members with chronic illnesses or disabilities.

When possible, share caregiving responsibilities. One of my colleagues is part of a large family that’s sharing the care of their elderly family members. Both children and grandchildren take turns with doctor visits, pharmacy runs, shopping, etc. They created a schedule and documented it for accountability. For one grandparent whose vision is failing, her young granddaughter comes over every Saturday to make breakfast and read to her grandmother—a date they both look forward to.

3. Organize important papers

Most people don’t realize how many legal documents they already have, or how many they will need for matters that arise.

Important documents include:

  • Birth certificate
  • Marriage certificate
  • Divorce decree
  • Citizenship papers
  • Death certificate of a spouse or parent
  • Power(s) of attorney
  • Deeds to property
  • Deeds to cemetery plots
  • Military discharge papers
  • Insurance policies
  • Pension benefits
  • Miscellaneous financial documents—to banking, savings accounts and brokerage accounts

4. Explore potential financial help

Investigate public benefits: 

  • Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI)
  • Supplemental Security Income (SSI)
  • Veterans benefits
  • Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (formerly known as food stamps)
  • Medicare and Medicaid
  • Online tools like AARP Foundation’s Local Assistance Directory and the National Council on Aging’s Benefits

Long-term care insurance

Examine your loved one’s insurance and retirement plans, including (where applicable) life insurance, disability coverage, pension benefits, long-term care insurance and workplace health insurance. See whether any of them covers home-health visits, skilled nursing, mental health services, or physical therapy and other short-term assistance.

To think about: Consider buying long-term care insurance before you need it. It’s inexpensive while you’re still young and healthy.

Family and Medical Leave Act

If you need to take a leave of absence from your job to care for a loved one, you may be entitled to up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave under the federal Family and Medical Leave Act. Some employers offer paid family leave, and California has implemented laws mandating paid leave for caregiving.

5. Look for tax breaks and life insurance deals

Your family member may be able to claim federal tax deductions for health-care costs, including a hospital bed or wheelchair and out-of-pocket expenses not covered by health insurance. Benefits also may include remodeling the home to make it accessible and hiring a part-time home-health aide. Your loved one also may have a life insurance policy that makes accelerated death payments to help pay for long-term care.

6. Think beyond your loved one: The surviving spouse

You may also need to manage benefits of the surviving spouse. That person may be the beneficiary of an IRA, bank account, life insurance policy and/or pension benefits. There may also be a plan and money set aside to care for a pet.

A Living Trust provides peace of mind

A Living Trust is a legal document that contains instructions for what you want to happen to your assets when you die. For my family, it meant that when my parents died, all of their affairs were in order, they had transferred all of their assets into the Living Trust and identified their heirs. Without a Living Trust, their estate would have gone into Probate and my brother and I would have been dealing with this long, expensive process—even while mourning the death of our parents.

Sonoma County LDA is proud of our comprehensive Living Trust package that includes a Power of Attorney and Advanced Healthcare DirectiveBest of all, we guide you through it and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley, Benicia, Vallejo, Martinez, Fairfield.

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 10:14 AM No comments: 

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Thursday, January 6, 2022

How Will We Be Eating in 2022? Think Healthy

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You may or may not make formal New Year’s resolutions, but many of us make little promises to ourselves–to spend more time with our families, to exercise more and eat a healthier diet. To tackle that old to-do list. Creating a Living Trust tops many to-do lists. After nearly two years of Covid and no end in sight, creating a Trust has never been more important. Our Trust package includes a Power of Attorney and an Advance Healthcare Directive. Make this part of your healthier New Year.

Eating a healthier diet is the overarching food trend of the year

Whole Foods’ Trends Council identified seven food trends for 2022. Who are these guys? The Trends Council is made up of local foragers, regional and global buyers and culinary experts. Their predictions are based on their experience in product sourcing and studying consumer preferences and emerging brands. Important consideration is given to how the pandemic has impacted our buying habits.

These seven trends made it to the Trends Council’s hot list

1. Ultra-urban farming: Faster time to market means more nutritious

Urban farming has gotten a big boost from technology, and hyper-local produce can be grown more sustainably. The big benefit: more nutritious produce. Brooklyn’s Gotham Greens started out with a 20,000-square-foot greenhouse, and they’re now working on their ninth hydroponic greenhouse.

2. “Reducetarianism” foods: We’re cutting way back on animal products

Americans are reducing consumption of meat and animal products. I’m now eating a mostly plant-based diet and I’ve found that many of my friends and colleagues are cutting down on meat as well—even if it’s only one or two days/week. When they do eat animal products, reducetarians make sure they’re eating high quality, like Epic Provisions bison bacon cranberry bar, made with grass-fed bison and Applegate Well Carved burgers, made with a mix of grass-fed beef and vegetables.

3. Hibiscus

Hibiscus has long been recognized for its culinary and medicinal applications. You can eat the flower straight from the plant, but it’s more generally used in tea, relishes, jam and salads. High in vitamin C, it’s packed with antioxidants. It helps boost immunity, lower cholesterol and blood pressure.

4. Buzz-less spirits

The market for nonalcoholic spirits is on fire; it’s expected to grow a whopping 35 percent by 2023. There’s a widening array of nonalcoholic drinks, and low-alcohol seltzers have seized the market. Winemakers are looking for new ways to reach the consumer who doesn’t want a buzz. Ask any of the 500+ winery owners in the Napa Valley and they’ll tell you that wine sales are down and baby boomers are no longer buying those high-priced cabernets. Consumers’ growing interest in wellness has contributed to the no- and low-alcohol products.

6. Sunflower seeds

Sunflower seed-based products are now a trend—they’re showing up in crackers, spreads, ice cream and cheese. Ben & Jerry’s new flavors are made with sunflower butter–Creme Brulée Cookie and Mint Chocolate Cookie. Those who are allergic to nuts find that they can eat delicious sunflower seed products. Think peanut butter that’s made with sunflower seeds, delivering a rich, nutty taste that doesn’t kill them–Mother Butter, Fix & Fogg Oaty Nut Butter.

7. Prebiotics

Prebiotics are special plant fibers that help healthy bacteria grow in your gut, making your digestive system work better. Prebiotics are found in garlic, onions, asparagus, bananas and barley. Drinks like Poppi have become popular for their natural prebiotics from unfiltered apple cider vinegar, keeping gut and immune system healthy.

A Living Trust provides peace of mind

A Living Trust is a legal document that contains instructions for what you want to happen to your assets when you die. For my family, it meant that when my parents died, all of their affairs were in order, they had transferred all of their assets into the Living Trust and identified their heirs. Without a Living Trust, an estate goes into Probate.

We’re proud of our comprehensive Living Trust package that includes a Power of Attorney and Advanced Healthcare DirectiveBest of all, we guide you through it and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Tuesday, May 22nd, 2024

How Can We Support Those Who Are Going Through Divorce?

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Mette Harrison is a novelist who also works in the financial industry. She was blindsided by her husband’s leaving her after six kids and 30 years of marriage. She also lost half of her friends. Sound familiar? According to a 2013 study headed by Brown University scholar Rose McDermott, if people in your close social network divorce, the risk of your marriage ending greatly increases. The result is that many divorced people find themselves losing not only a mate but the family home, their lifestyle and their friends.

Learning to accept and ask for help

One woman who was mourning the loss of friends also admits that “I didn’t know what I needed even when people asked.” One friend offered a bed until Ms. Harrison could find an apartment; another walked her through a frank assessment of her financial situation. A third texted every day for a year — a simple back and forth that she depended on to calm her panic in the early months. Her older brother set up a recurring monthly payment for rent and food plus a wish list on Amazon.

I can’t fix it, but I’m here for you

There are many ways to help those slammed by the shame, shock and economic panic of a separation or divorce. Ashley Mead, a New York psychotherapist who specializes in divorce, recommends connection. “Divorcees are losing the person they have been most connected to for their whole lives,” said Ms. Mead in an email. “They are often desperate and feel incredible shame.”

“Show up,” but forget “I told you so.” If you don’t know what to say, try this: “I know I can’t fix it but I am here for you. Trying to cheer someone up is often about calming our own discomfort.” Ensure that your friend has a place to vent, cry, laugh and think out loud.” Don’t stop inviting divorced friends to parties just because they are single. Call them on holidays even years after the divorce is over. Remember that it takes a few years to make new friends and rebuild a social network. A supportive person helps you see yourself in a bright next chapter, not someone who urges you to complain or stay mired in victim mode.

Offer to help with small projects

Divorce often means that now there’s just one person to manage daily chores–carpooling, paying bills, yard work. If you’re looking for creative ways to support a friend, think about offering to babysit one night/week, helping clean house once/month, car repair or small projects around the house.

Grief, loss and validation

For those who tell their friends they’re divorcing and their friends respond with “Great!”–that’s validation that it’s way past time to get out of a bad relationship. The language around divorce is all about failure, but sometimes it’s a victory that can help people make needed change.

The economics of divorce

The economic impact of almost every divorce hits hard; studies show that income may drop, especially for women. In an earlier article, we noted women’s standard of living may drop 27%. Details around spousal and child support take months and to get ironed out. Sydney Petite left her marriage in July of 2018 with three children. While she was awarded support from her ex-husband, she didn’t receive any payments for nearly three years. “I am where I am today because of unexpected support,” she said.

Other avenues of support could include gathering friends to pay for a few hours of an attorney’s time or organizing meal deliveries. “It can take years to get back to a stable financial situation,” said Alex Beattie, co-founder of Divide and Thrive, a downloadable financial divorce tool. “Dropping off a few meals or a few movie tickets can lighten someone’s spirits without costing much.”

Sonoma County LDA’s Divorce and Mediation Services

Sonoma County LDA has been assisting Bay Area couples with Divorce for nearly 20 years. While the majority of our clients may not have worked out the details, they know they are willing to reach agreement on division of assets and a parenting plan—and those are the critical components of an Amicable Divorce. Our Guided Mediation is for couples whose Divorce has stalled for whatever reasons. We guide you through it, and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley, Benicia, Vallejo, Martinez, Fairfield.

This article based on an article in The New York Times.

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 12:46 PM No comments: 

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Wednesday, February 9, 2022

Power of Attorney: There’s Always Room for Family Conflict

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Anyone who grew up in a dysfunctional family understands the potential for discord when it comes to the family estate and an inheritance. But even in the closest of families, if there’s money involved, there’s room for conflict.

Power of Attorney: Choose the person you can trust

In Alana’s case, the dust was still settling on her third divorce, and one of her kids was in and out of rehab for substance abuse. The youngest of three siblings, Alana always struggled to measure up to her rock-star brother and sister—they were the ones who excelled at everything they did, winning awards, graduating with honors and building successful careers. She was the one who always seemed to make a mess of everything.

And now her parents had named her brother their Agent for their Power of Attorney. She was hurt because this was something she had wanted to do—a chance to redeem herself to her family. But the fact that her own financial affairs were a mess and she couldn’t balance her own checkbook led her father to appoint her investment banker brother. It was he who would also be the Executor of the estate. Her sister, a doctor, would be their parents’ Agent for their Healthcare Directives. Alana was left out once again.

Your Power of Attorney is the person who will act on your behalf if you become incapacitated, the one who will take over your financial affairs, pay your bills and taxes, open bank accounts, withdraw funds, cash checks and trade stocks. It must be someone you trust; ideally, it’s someone who lives close by.

Parents tend to appoint one of their children as Power of Attorney for practical reasons. Many put their faith in their oldest child or choose the son or daughter who lives closest or the one who has a financial services background. In the same vein, for their Agent for an Advance Healthcare Directive, parents are likely to choose a son or daughter with healthcare experience.

There are limits on the powers of the Power of Attorney designation

  • Right to information. The parent does not have to disclose to friends and family whom he or she named as Agent under the Power of Attorney. Likewise, that Agent is not obligated to provide information about the parent to his or her siblings.
  • Limits on the powers of a Power of Attorney. A Power of Attorney designation does not enable the Agent to do whatever he or she wants. An Agent cannot change the principal’s will, breach his or her fiduciary duty or change or transfer the Power of Attorney designation to someone else.
  • Power of Attorney expires at death. When the parent dies, the Power of Attorney ends and the Executor of the estate – appointed by either the principal or the court – takes control over the decedent’s property.
  • Revocation of a Power of Attorney. The parent can revoke whomever he/she has appointed as the Power of Attorney. The revocation must be in writing and the former Agent Power of Attorney should be advised of the revocation.

Avoiding the potential for sibling discord

Sometimes conflict is inevitable. One child may be resentful that he or she was not chosen. Another child may not trust the chosen sibling to act according to the parent’s wishes. Just knowing that a Power of Attorney can be challenged in court is often enough for a sibling to act on his or her distrust or resentment. To minimize confrontations, as the principal appointing the Power of Attorney, there are alternative solutions:

  • Designate co-Agents in the Power of Attorney document. Appointing two persons can be problematic if the Agents cannot get along. You could create separate responsibilities for each Agent, but that can be unwieldy and still can lend itself to conflict.
  • Avoid appointing a family member altogether. Name a close friend, fiduciary or a bank. Avoiding conflicts and court involvement is important to ensure your wishes will be followed.

A Living Trust: One of the most thoughtful things you can do for your family

A Living Trust is a legal document that contains instructions for what you want to happen to your assets when you die. For my family, it meant that when my parents died, all of their affairs were in order, they had transferred all of their assets into the Living Trust and identified their heirs. Without a Living Trust, their estate would have gone into Probate and my brother and I would have been dealing with this long, expensive process—even while mourning the death of our parents.

Sonoma County LDA is proud of our comprehensive Living Trust package that includes a Power of Attorney and Advanced Healthcare DirectiveBest of all, we guide you through it and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley, Benicia, Vallejo, Martinez, Fairfield.

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 12:45 PM No comments: 

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Wednesday, February 2, 2022

Reverse Mortgage: Solution or Scam?

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When Jeannie was having trouble making ends meet after her husband died, she asked my friend Jim what he thought about reverse mortgages. Jim spent 40 years in the financial services industry, and these guys tend to be wary of things like life insurance and reverse mortgages. As predicted, Jim told her it was a very bad idea. To her credit, Jeannie ignored Jim and decided to go through with a reverse mortgage on the home she and her husband bought more than 30 years ago.

The right decision for Jeannie and many other seniors

It’s been four years, and for Jeannie, it was the right decision. A reverse mortgage has eased her cash-flow problems and improved the quality of her life. For many older homeowners, a reverse mortgage is the ideal way to supplement retirement income, consolidate debts or cover expenses like health care.

Accessing your home’s equity and using it like a savings account

A reverse mortgage is a type of loan that’s designed to give people access to the equity they’ve built up in their homes. In Jeannie’s case, this was considerable—a lovely home in Pasadena that they bought 30+ years ago that was paid off. The borrower gets what is, in effect, a tax-free advance on their equity, in the form of a line of credit, fixed monthly payments or a lump sum. For most reverse mortgages, homeowners must use the proceeds to pay off their existing mortgage; the remainder of the loan comes due when the owner moves, sells the house or dies.

Available to homeowners 62 and over, reverse mortgages are somewhat complex, and they can be risky. With a target audience of potentially vulnerable seniors, scam artists have proliferated, drawing homeowners into bad or outright bogus deals. While the scams vary, the premise remains the same: The scammers want to put the home equity these seniors have spent years accumulating into their own pockets.

Beware a group effort by a team of real-estate industry scammers

It’s often a group effort, with unscrupulous mortgage brokers or financial advisers joining forces with corrupt appraisers, attorneys and loan officers. They’ll finagle an inflated appraisal of a home’s value, thus inflating the equity and the potential loan, and try to persuade the owner to take out a reverse mortgage. The team of crooks will handle the paperwork, close the loan and come up with a pretext to get the money or even take title to the house.

  • These fraudsters might try to sell you on a supposedly can’t-miss investment or financial product.
  • A scam contractor may fast-talk you into using a reverse mortgage to pay for home improvements.
  • Some scammers target financially strapped homeowners, touting reverse mortgages as a way to avoid foreclosure or get out of debt.
  • They may charge fees running into the thousands of dollars to provide information about reverse mortgages that’s actually available for free from the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD).

In California, you’re required to meet with a HUD counselor

Note that for a legitimate reverse mortgage in California, you must meet with a reverse mortgage counselor approved by the U.S. Department of Housing & Urban Development (HUD). This counselor is trained to make sure you thoroughly understand the benefits and risks of reverse mortgages.

Warning signs of reverse mortgage scams

  • A broker or lender uses high-pressure tactics to try to talk you into a reverse mortgage.
  • They claim the loan is safe because it’s insured by the Federal Housing Administration (FHA). The FHA does insure some reverse mortgages, but that coverage doesn’t protect the borrower; it’s for the lender, in case of default.
  • They don’t disclose the fees, conditions and risks that come with taking out a reverse mortgage, including the possible loss of the home, which serves as collateral.

Tips for avoiding scams. Do not:

  • Respond to unsolicited advertisements.
  • Sign anything that you do not fully understand.
  • Accept payment from individuals for a home you did not purchase.

Be suspicious of anyone claiming that you can own a home with no down payment.

To report a scam: AARP Fraud Watch Network Helpline. 877-908-3360

A Living Trust: One of the most thoughtful things you can do for your family

A Living Trust is a legal document that contains instructions for what you want to happen to your assets when you die. For my family, it meant that when my parents died, all of their affairs were in order, they had transferred all of their assets into the Living Trust and identified their heirs. Without a Living Trust, their estate would have gone into Probate and my brother and I would have been dealing with this long, expensive process—even while mourning the death of our parents.

Sonoma County LDA is proud of our comprehensive Living Trust package that includes a Power of Attorney and Advanced Healthcare DirectiveBest of all, we guide you through it and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley, Benicia, Vallejo, Martinez, Fairfield.

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 11:03 AM No comments: 

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Wednesday, January 26, 2022

Wearables Have Stepped up to Monitor Your Health

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A Sonoma County LDA Trust client, Shirley, decided that the new year was time for making long overdue changes to her life. She made an appointment to create a Living Trust, which includes a Power of Attorney and an Advance Healthcare Directive, that she’d been putting off for years. She started doing yoga twice/week and got serious about using the smartwatch her kids gave her for Christmas.

Smartwatches keep getting smarter

A 62-year old bookkeeper, Shirley has high blood pressure and some other health issues. She’s delighted with her smartwatch—she sets alarms during the day that remind her to get up from her desk and stretch–this is especially important as tax season looms. She now takes a brisk walk during her lunch break, and she’s using her smartwatch to monitor her blood pressure and oxygen levels.

Today’s smartwatches and other health-related wearables do a lot more than count steps or let you see how many calories you’ve burned.

 


Socks monitor foot temperature, helping reduce foot ulcers for diabetes patients

San Francisco-based Siren is producing a wearable for your feet–machine-washable socks for people living with diabetes and neuropathy. The socks come with a Bluetooth hub that plugs in and lets a team of nurses monitor the temperature of the foot, which Siren says has been shown to reduce diabetic foot ulcers by up to 87.5 percent. On the market for about five years, Medicare covers the cost. You need a prescription but not a smartphone.

Other health wearables on the cusp

  • Swiss startup Aktiia announced plans to bring its automated wrist-worn 24/7 blood pressure device to the United States. The company has about 15,000 customers in Europe.
  • Abbott announced a new line of consumer “biowearables” to continuously track signals for glucose, ketones and lactate. It will eventually track alcohol levels.
  • Worn on the back of the arm, FreeStyle Libre is about the size of two stacked quarters and is used widely by diabetics. A tiny filament the width of three human hairs is placed just below the surface of the skin, where it measures molecular biomarkers. Data is sent via Bluetooth to an app on your smartphone every minute, giving users insights into what’s going on in real time. It’s available by prescription and lasts 14 days, when the user peels it off and applies a new one.

Information accuracy is best when backed up by a doctor or FDA

While there are no guarantees with these wearable devices, you generally can put more faith in a device that your doctor prescribes or recommends, or that has the blessing of the FDA.

Swiss company Aktiia plans to make its blood pressure watch available through doctors rather than as a direct-to-consumer offering, at least initially. The company is engaged in clinical partnerships and pilots in the U.S., including a study with hypertension patients at Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston. As the technology evolves, so will the safety and data protocols.

Data must be understandable and secure

When in doubt, reach out to your doctor. The onus is on the makers of the wearable devices to clearly explain what the data mean and the consequences. You should also be informed about a device’s limitations. A good example: When you launch the ECG app on the Apple Watch, you’ll see a message that says “Apple Watch never checks for heart attacks.”

If you’re not aware of privacy issues these days, you’re not paying attention. Find out how the device makers and medical providers plan to safeguard your information and keep it confidential. The FTC affirmed in September 2021 that health apps and connected devices that collect or hold fertility, glucose level, heart health and other health data must notify consumers in the event of a breach.

With the promise comes peril

“There’s promise in all of this technology, but also peril,” says Patrice Harris, chief executive officer and cofounder of digital health care company eMed and former president of the American Medical Association. “I always say proceed with caution and have some curiosity.”

Creating a Living Trust: One of the most thoughtful things you can do for your family

A Living Trust is a legal document that contains instructions for what you want to happen to your assets when you die. For my family, it meant that when my parents died, all of their affairs were in order, they had transferred all of their assets into the Living Trust and identified their heirs. Without a Living Trust, their estate would have gone into Probate and my brother and I would have been dealing with this long, expensive process—even while mourning the death of our parents.

Sonoma County LDA is proud of our comprehensive Living Trust package that includes a Power of Attorney and Advanced Healthcare DirectiveBest of all, we guide you through it and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley,

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 10:12 AM No comments: 

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Wednesday, January 19, 2022

Women, Divorce and the Economic Realities

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Each year, nearly 2.8 million men and women go through Divorce. In the first year after the Divorce is final, a wife’s standard of living may drop almost 27 percent. Compare that to her husband’s standard of living—it may increase by as much as 10 percent! In the nearly 20 years that Sonoma County LDA has been assisting our clients with Divorce, it’s hardly surprising that women are concerned about financial survival in the high-priced Bay Area.

Many factors contribute to lowering the standard of living         

Women generally end up with custody of the kids, and child support may not be enough to cover the actual cost of child rearing. For stay-at-home moms or those who held part-time jobs, getting back into the workforce and finding well-paying jobs is extremely difficult. It takes years to get on a career path to start making a good living. Divorce is expensive—there are court costs, therapist bills, getting established in new living situations based on a single paycheck. If you are contemplating divorce, now is the time to rethink your spending. Where can you cut back and start saving money that you’re going to need?

Do your research. Talk to single moms; consult with a financial adviser

If you’re contemplating Divorce, start doing some research. Talk to your friends who are single moms. Be fully aware of just how difficult it will be—especially if you don’t have family to help with the kids. Consult with a lawyer and a financial advisor. Make sure you’ve fully considered the impact of Divorce on your kids, your spouse and your life. Think about timing. If you’ve been married nine years, you might want to stick out the last year, so you can collect on your ex’s earnings record.

Make copies of all financial documents

Make a copy of all tax returns, loan applications, wills, trusts, financial statements, your mortgage, banking information, brokerage statements, loan documents, credit card statements, deeds to real property, car registration, insurance inventories, and insurance policies. If you have assets that you brought into the marriage, these will remain yours as long as you can document your ownership.

Be suspicious. Look for signs that your husband may be hiding income

Make sure you’re including any safe deposit boxes and reviewing pay stubs, retirement plans, and insurance policies. If your spouse’s business generates a lot of cash, find a forensic accountant to look for signs of additional income that he may be hiding. Don’t overlook hobbies or side businesses that generate income. Here’s an example: My neighbor Allen makes exquisite knives in his workshop that he sells for up to $1K/each. Working with iron and metal is his hobby, and when he sells something, there’s no record of it, and he doesn’t pay any taxes. But at $1K/each, he’s generating a nice little revenue stream. California is a community property state, and you’re entitled to half of this kind of income.

Did you help your husband get a degree or pay for grad school?

My accountant put her husband through law school, and he’s now a partner in a prestigious San Francisco law firm. When he wanted a divorce, she put her savvy CPA brain to work and received a generous compensation for those years she worked to put him through school.

Consider big-picture tax consequences

Get an accountant to help you make these decisions because they will have profound effects on your future and that of your children.

  • Monthly alimony or a lump sum?
  • What is his retirement plan worth?
  • Should you keep the family home or sell it now?
  • Who pays the mortgage until it sells?

Selling the family home is a difficult decision, but in too many cases, women hang on to the house because of the emotional bonds. They want their kids to stay in a neighborhood where they have friends and feel safe. But in too many cases, that home is too expensive to maintain. The constant upkeep, the landscaping and repairs, the mow and blow guy who comes once/week. All of this becomes a burden. Better to move to a smaller home in a neighborhood that’s more affordable.

Become your own advocate. Prepare for your future

Be informed. Taking an active role in the divorce negotiations will help you reach a better settlement. During our Guided Mediation, we often see couples improving communication through the mediation process. They will need this as they raise their kids together. Stand up for yourself and get your share so you’re able to take care of yourself and your children financially.

If you stayed home to take care of your kids, you’ll need to find a way to support yourself and your children. Get career counseling and training. You may need to go back to school, so prepare for the expense of tuition and books. You’re creating a new life for your family.

Sonoma County LDA’s Divorce and Mediation Services

Sonoma County LDA has been assisting Bay Area couples with Divorce for nearly 20 years. While the majority of our clients may not have worked out the details, they know they are willing to reach agreement on division of assets and a parenting plan—and those are the critical components of an Amicable Divorce. Our Guided Mediation is for couples whose Divorce has stalled for whatever reasons. We guide you through it, and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley, Benicia, Vallejo, Martinez, Fairfield.

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 1:47 PM No comments: 

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Wednesday, January 12, 2022

The Crisis of Caregiving: A Legal Checklist

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If you’re paying attention, you’re aware that the subject of caregiving is coming up a lot more frequently in the news and in conversations with friends and colleagues. The AARP is devoting one of its monthly newsletter to a variety of topics related to caring for America’s aging family members. Two years of Covid have made the situation worse. While we don’t hear enough about it, many Covid survivors are left with conditions as severe and varied as organ failure, brain fog, memory loss, fatigue, loss of smell and taste, etc. Many people are no longer able to return to their pre-Covid lives or employment. It’s their family members who are left coping with their care.

If you’re a caregiver, part of your job may be to keep track of your loved one’s legal matters. 

1. Creating a Living Trust

A Living Trust is the legal document that outlines the way in which your assets will pass on to your loved ones when you die. Our Living Trust package also includes a Will, a Power of Attorney and an Advance Healthcare Directive. These legal documents will allow an appointed person to make medical or financial decisions for those who are incapacitated or no longer able to make these decisions for themselves. A loved one needs to create these documents when he or she is still capable of making legal decisions. With the diagnosis of dementia on the rise, testamentary capacity— a person’s legal and mental ability to make or alter a valid legal document—has become a growing concern.

2. Make a family plan; share caregiving responsibilities

Not surprisingly, two out of every three caregivers in the United States are women. Somehow they’re getting it done–holding down full-time jobs, taking care of the home, raising their kids and providing regular support for family members with chronic illnesses or disabilities.

When possible, share caregiving responsibilities. One of my colleagues is part of a large family that’s sharing the care of their elderly family members. Both children and grandchildren take turns with doctor visits, pharmacy runs, shopping, etc. They created a schedule and documented it for accountability. For one grandparent whose vision is failing, her young granddaughter comes over every Saturday to make breakfast and read to her grandmother—a date they both look forward to.

3. Organize important papers

Most people don’t realize how many legal documents they already have, or how many they will need for matters that arise.

Important documents include:

  • Birth certificate
  • Marriage certificate
  • Divorce decree
  • Citizenship papers
  • Death certificate of a spouse or parent
  • Power(s) of attorney
  • Deeds to property
  • Deeds to cemetery plots
  • Military discharge papers
  • Insurance policies
  • Pension benefits
  • Miscellaneous financial documents—to banking, savings accounts and brokerage accounts

4. Explore potential financial help

Investigate public benefits: 

  • Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI)
  • Supplemental Security Income (SSI)
  • Veterans benefits
  • Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (formerly known as food stamps)
  • Medicare and Medicaid
  • Online tools like AARP Foundation’s Local Assistance Directory and the National Council on Aging’s Benefits

Long-term care insurance

Examine your loved one’s insurance and retirement plans, including (where applicable) life insurance, disability coverage, pension benefits, long-term care insurance and workplace health insurance. See whether any of them covers home-health visits, skilled nursing, mental health services, or physical therapy and other short-term assistance.

To think about: Consider buying long-term care insurance before you need it. It’s inexpensive while you’re still young and healthy.

Family and Medical Leave Act

If you need to take a leave of absence from your job to care for a loved one, you may be entitled to up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave under the federal Family and Medical Leave Act. Some employers offer paid family leave, and California has implemented laws mandating paid leave for caregiving.

5. Look for tax breaks and life insurance deals

Your family member may be able to claim federal tax deductions for health-care costs, including a hospital bed or wheelchair and out-of-pocket expenses not covered by health insurance. Benefits also may include remodeling the home to make it accessible and hiring a part-time home-health aide. Your loved one also may have a life insurance policy that makes accelerated death payments to help pay for long-term care.

6. Think beyond your loved one: The surviving spouse

You may also need to manage benefits of the surviving spouse. That person may be the beneficiary of an IRA, bank account, life insurance policy and/or pension benefits. There may also be a plan and money set aside to care for a pet.

A Living Trust provides peace of mind

A Living Trust is a legal document that contains instructions for what you want to happen to your assets when you die. For my family, it meant that when my parents died, all of their affairs were in order, they had transferred all of their assets into the Living Trust and identified their heirs. Without a Living Trust, their estate would have gone into Probate and my brother and I would have been dealing with this long, expensive process—even while mourning the death of our parents.

Sonoma County LDA is proud of our comprehensive Living Trust package that includes a Power of Attorney and Advanced Healthcare DirectiveBest of all, we guide you through it and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley, Benicia, Vallejo, Martinez, Fairfield.

Posted by Sonoma County LDA at 10:14 AM No comments: 

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Thursday, January 6, 2022

How Will We Be Eating in 2022? Think Healthy

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You may or may not make formal New Year’s resolutions, but many of us make little promises to ourselves–to spend more time with our families, to exercise more and eat a healthier diet. To tackle that old to-do list. Creating a Living Trust tops many to-do lists. After nearly two years of Covid and no end in sight, creating a Trust has never been more important. Our Trust package includes a Power of Attorney and an Advance Healthcare Directive. Make this part of your healthier New Year.

Eating a healthier diet is the overarching food trend of the year

Whole Foods’ Trends Council identified seven food trends for 2022. Who are these guys? The Trends Council is made up of local foragers, regional and global buyers and culinary experts. Their predictions are based on their experience in product sourcing and studying consumer preferences and emerging brands. Important consideration is given to how the pandemic has impacted our buying habits.

These seven trends made it to the Trends Council’s hot list

1. Ultra-urban farming: Faster time to market means more nutritious

Urban farming has gotten a big boost from technology, and hyper-local produce can be grown more sustainably. The big benefit: more nutritious produce. Brooklyn’s Gotham Greens started out with a 20,000-square-foot greenhouse, and they’re now working on their ninth hydroponic greenhouse.

2. “Reducetarianism” foods: We’re cutting way back on animal products

Americans are reducing consumption of meat and animal products. I’m now eating a mostly plant-based diet and I’ve found that many of my friends and colleagues are cutting down on meat as well—even if it’s only one or two days/week. When they do eat animal products, reducetarians make sure they’re eating high quality, like Epic Provisions bison bacon cranberry bar, made with grass-fed bison and Applegate Well Carved burgers, made with a mix of grass-fed beef and vegetables.

3. Hibiscus

Hibiscus has long been recognized for its culinary and medicinal applications. You can eat the flower straight from the plant, but it’s more generally used in tea, relishes, jam and salads. High in vitamin C, it’s packed with antioxidants. It helps boost immunity, lower cholesterol and blood pressure.

4. Buzz-less spirits

The market for nonalcoholic spirits is on fire; it’s expected to grow a whopping 35 percent by 2023. There’s a widening array of nonalcoholic drinks, and low-alcohol seltzers have seized the market. Winemakers are looking for new ways to reach the consumer who doesn’t want a buzz. Ask any of the 500+ winery owners in the Napa Valley and they’ll tell you that wine sales are down and baby boomers are no longer buying those high-priced cabernets. Consumers’ growing interest in wellness has contributed to the no- and low-alcohol products.

6. Sunflower seeds

Sunflower seed-based products are now a trend—they’re showing up in crackers, spreads, ice cream and cheese. Ben & Jerry’s new flavors are made with sunflower butter–Creme Brulée Cookie and Mint Chocolate Cookie. Those who are allergic to nuts find that they can eat delicious sunflower seed products. Think peanut butter that’s made with sunflower seeds, delivering a rich, nutty taste that doesn’t kill them–Mother Butter, Fix & Fogg Oaty Nut Butter.

7. Prebiotics

Prebiotics are special plant fibers that help healthy bacteria grow in your gut, making your digestive system work better. Prebiotics are found in garlic, onions, asparagus, bananas and barley. Drinks like Poppi have become popular for their natural prebiotics from unfiltered apple cider vinegar, keeping gut and immune system healthy.

A Living Trust provides peace of mind

A Living Trust is a legal document that contains instructions for what you want to happen to your assets when you die. For my family, it meant that when my parents died, all of their affairs were in order, they had transferred all of their assets into the Living Trust and identified their heirs. Without a Living Trust, an estate goes into Probate.

We’re proud of our comprehensive Living Trust package that includes a Power of Attorney and Advanced Healthcare DirectiveBest of all, we guide you through it and we prepare the legal documents. Schedule an appointment with Sonoma County LDA today.

Sonoma County LDA services the entire Bay Area

Berkeley, El Cerrito, Richmond, Pinole, Alameda, San Leandro, Castro Valley Newark, San Lorenzo, Concord, Alamo, Danville, Lafayette, Orinda, Moraga, Pleasant Hill, Martinez, Pittsburg, Antioch, Brentwood, Oakley, Discovery Bay, Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore, Tracy and Fremont. Our clients also live in the Napa Valley, Benicia, Vallejo, Martinez, Fairfield